Formal Introductory Letter
Dear Prof Blackstone,
I hope this letter finds you well. My name is Faiz, a student in your critical thinking and communicating class. I would like to take a moment to introduce myself and share with you my goals for this module.
I graduated from Nanyang Polytechnic with a diploma in robotics and mechatronics in 2021. My interest in engineering stems from my childhood. Having been raised on a farm in Malaysia, my siblings and I didn't have much to do for fun. In order to pass the time, we would work on mini projects such as building cat houses and a seesaw. These memories instilled into me a love for tinkering, which led me to pursue an education and career in engineering.
One of my communication strengths is being open-minded. For example, during group discussions I tend to listen to what people have to say, extrapolating the pros and cons and thinking of ways to improve upon the idea. This helps to foster critical and objective thinking. On the other hand, my weakness is that I find it difficult to start conversations with strangers. I am an introvert and struggle with social interactions. With that being said, I am slowly but surely trying to step out of my comfort zone as I understand the importance of being able to express myself properly.
My personal goals from this module is to improve my interpersonal skills and formal writing. I would like to enhance the clarity and effectiveness of my communication both verbally and in writing in order to maintain the audiences’ attention and understanding.
Thank you for taking the time to read my letter. I look forward to learning from you and participating in your class.
Best regards,
Faiz
Fantastic letter my friend. Personally, I struggled to find any grammatical errors. Great work!
ReplyDeleteHi Faiz, i enjoyed reading your letter, especially how your love for engineering came about! The letter is short, concise and i enjoyed reading it. Good job!
ReplyDeleteGreetings Faiz,
ReplyDeleteThank you for your letter and for sharing insights into your background and goals for the class. Your letter is well-written and provides a good understanding of who you are. You are able to connect your background in robotics and mechatronics to your decision to pursue a degree, showcasing a clear transition in your educational journey. Your farm upbringing is a unique aspect of your identity. To enhance this section, consider briefly sharing how these values have directly influenced your academic or personal experiences. Overall, I enjoyed reading your letter. I look forward to a rewarding trimester together!
Thanks for the constructive feedback. I have made the edits.👍
DeleteHi! Love that it is short and easy to follow however, you are missing the specifies of your strengths and weaknesses. Other than that, it was a great read!
ReplyDeleteThanks for the constructive feedback. I'm not too sure how to elaborate but atleast i tried😅
DeleteDear Faiz,
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing so much in this clear, concise and informative letter. You address the key components of the brief and provide interesting details which shed light on your "creativity and ingenuity." I really appreciate learning, for instance, about your growing up in rural Malaysia and how that ties to your interest. When I read this point, I imagined you in a kampong, tinkering, but you actually state that you did so "on a farm." The thought evokes questions: What sort of farm? When did you move to Singapore? What was the reason for the move?
You also do a good job explaining chosen comm skills and elaborating. We'll certainly work on the aims you mention.
In terms of language use, this is fluent, but there is one sentence that needs review:
Having been raised on a farm in Malaysia, there wasn't much to do for fun.
> (dangling modifier: Who was raised on the farm? That "I" needs expressing here.) ?
I look forward to learning more about you this term.
Cheers,
Brad
Hi prof, I have made the edit for u to review, but im not sure if its right.
Delete